


A sky full of stars

by BwOaHh



Category: Formula 1 RPF, Motorsport RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Lando is cutee, M/M, Past Relationship(s), This Is STUPID
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-15
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-02-19 05:41:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22739623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BwOaHh/pseuds/BwOaHh
Summary: Six years ago,if you had asked Sebastian Vettel he would have answered differently from what he has now.But life couldn't be anymore better.He has a loving husband ,a cute son and to top of it ,he is one of the best lawyers in the city.Until a storm appears in the name of Valtteri Bottas.
Relationships: Fernando Alonso/Jenson Button, Kimi Räikkönen/Sebastian Vettel, Lewis Hamilton/Nico Rosberg, Valtteri Bottas/Kimi Räikkönen
Comments: 10
Kudos: 35





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So @greeny1710's Lawyer!Seb fics made me write this one.This fic is actually an adaptation of my favourite movie.This starts really fluffy in the start but goes down after that!It's kinda going to be an emotional rollercoaster.

Sebastian Vettel had no time for love.He was one of the best students in the Harvard law school and all he could think about was getting into a good law firm and then establishing his own law firm. But deep down he always had a longing for love He somehow wanted to fall in love with a guy who he can trust ,love and blabber about anything and everything.

"Come on Seb , don't be a bookworm"Jenson pulled Seb up from his bed where he was hurriedly typing his assignment.

"I need to finish this Jenson,last minute work will mess this up,you know how hard I worked for this"Seb pouted but Jenson was not budging to any of Seb's excuses.

"Nando will be there, it'll be fun"Jenson put on his best puppy dog expression. This was the problem with Seb ,all of his friends were in a relationship but Seb was not. He was always the third wheel to all his friends and when someone asks him out he refuses.At the same time he whines about not finding the perfect guy.His mother even tried to set him up with her friends' sons but Seb did not budge to any of them.He will not.

Until.

Two years later his mother called him one day and told that she had a proposal from a really good family and that guy would be perfect for Seb.

Seb begged his mom like anything but she was not having any of Seb's antics.Three months later he was married to the guy whom he doesn't even know about.His mom told him that he was a "rally racer".Seb did not even know what his favourite color was. This is going to be ridiculous,all his dreams about finding love was shattered.Jenson was so happy when he told he was getting married.Jenson and Fernando got married as soon as they graduated a year ago and from then all they wanted was Seb to get married.

"Now I pronounce you husband and husband"Seb hesitantly kissed the guys cheek and took a deep breath.This was going to be one hell of a ride.

*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"**"*"*"*"*"*"*"*"*  
Six years later..  
Manchester, United Kingdom

"Are you a rogue to whistle? "Nico Rosberg caught his son George whistling while he was getting ready to work.This was a normal scene in the Hamilton household.

"Behave like a school boy,George" Like father like son,Nico mumbled under his breath and straightened his sons tie.His husband Lewis was sitting across the table and he threw George's socks at his face.

"Don't spoil my mood early morning."Nico took his Messenger bag and shut the door with a slam.Lewis raised George on his lap and put his socks.

"Dad,will you be early this evening?"George asked his father with eagerness.

"No Georgie,dad's got some important work to do.How about I take you out this weekend.Just you me and daddy?Just like old times."He kissed his son on the cheek.

"But Dad,everyone's parents are coming to pick them up.I feel badd"George said with a frown.

"Bug,you know how busy pops and I are these days.I've really got to finish this coursework by today so that kids like you could learn more?Ok bud?Isn't uncle Kimi taking good care of you?"He asked his son.

"Uncle Kimi is the best,but sometimes i need you dad"George hugged him tight and took his school bag to the opposite apartment.The apartment where George is most of the time.The Raikkonen-Vettels.

He opened the apartment door and his uncle Kimi was polishing Lando's shoes while his Uncle Seb was fixing his hair whistling.Yes,this was where he learnt to whistle.Seb and Kimi always used to whistle,they even communicate using whistling and George absolutely loved that.When Seb saw George he came to him and ruffled his hair like he always did.

"Hey bug, uncle Kimi made scrambled eggs,we saved you some.Lando is in the kitchen having breakfast,go join him"Seb carried George to the kitchen and Lando was stuffing his mouth with egg.

"Hey Georgiee!!! Come on!"He patted the seat next to him and George sat next to Lando.Lando handed him a plate and both of them had breakfast in silence.Seb kissed both the boys forehead left to the door.

"Bye kids!I left some lasagna in the fridge "Seb came back like he forgot something.He tiptoed and kissed Kimi on the lips and left with a smirk.Lando rolled his eyes at his parents.After the kids had their breakfast Kimi dropped them off at school and went back home.When Lando was adopted,Kimi stopped racing and he was working for the team providing his input whenver needed. Both him and his husband were well enough,so Kimi thought he could take a break and look after Lando while he grew up.

Seb parked his Aston Martin in the parking lot and walked to his office.He was so proud of the accomplishments he made at such a young age.He was just 29 but he was already a senior partner in one of the most famous law firms in UK.He used to take cases more often when he was working for the firm but now he is more relaxed and just takes up the cases which he feels is most important.His other partner Christian is also a cool guy so they were almost like the dream team.

He went to his office and slumped on his chair rotating in it.He looked at the family portrait on the desk and smiled.Seb never knew that arranged marriage could be this interesting.Sure both he and Kimi had their shy phases but when the got to know each other well Kimi was such a sweet guy.He looked at Lando in the picture who was just two years old when they adopted him.Seb was really at the peak of his growing career and the addition of Lando made his life more and more lovely.He looked at his schedule which was pretty much going to the progress of the cases his juniors were assigned to.Seb switched his stereo and started working humming to the music playing in his office.

"Here"Lando placed the lasagna in front of George who was whining he was hungry.He kids come home at 3 and Kimi was out meeting with some friends.Lando took a bite from George's plated and hummed.

"Aren't your parents at home?"George asked digging into the food.

"They are very irresponsible.They go out on dates without even considering they have a kid at home.They are like teenagers"Lando chuckled and took another bite from the plate.

"Even my parents loved each other for six years,but now they always fight over little things"George told lando.

"Your parents fell in love and got married.My parents got married and fell in love."Lando shrugged at George and continued stealing bites of food from George's plate.

Back in the office Seb looked at the watch and it was five.Christian knocked the door and Seb asked him to come in.Christian sat down opposite to Seb and looked at him with an amusing smile.

"Today is Olivia's birthday party,bring your hero and be on time please"Christian told him.

Seb gave him a sheepish smile."Christian its Saturday,sooo...."Seb dragged and gave him an apologetic smile.Christian chuckled at Seb.

"You still follow that tradition?"Christian asked.

"Without fail! I'm really sorry Christian.I'll bring Kimi one day home to see my little Liv,is that alright?"Seb twirled his car keys and ran out.When he opened the elevator he saw Dan and Max kissing passionately.When they saw Seb they ran out muttering apologies.Seb shook his head with a smile.

When he reached home Kimi was preparing dinner and Lando was sitting on the kitchen top helping his papa chop vegetables.Seb wrapped his arms around Kimi's waist.

"Kimiiii"

"Hmmm"

"Today I saw Dan and Max kissing in the elevator,you know how close they were?"Seb buried his face in the crook of Kimi's neck and smiled.

"So?"Kimi asked and Seb swatted his arm.He went to the bedroom to change and when he was back Kimi smiled at him.Seb winked at him and made a mwah sound at Kimi.Kimi mouthed "after he sleeps" .Lando got down from the kitchen and looked at Seb.Seb winced when he found out that Lando saw everything in the mirror that was hanging in the kitchen

"Dad,can't you see the mirror?"Lando laughed.

"Papa,Suurin lakimies kaupungissa, mutta ei voi olla hienovarainen miehensä kanssa,papa on sellainen dork "Lando poked his tongue at his dad and ran to his room.Kimi smirked at his son who was pulling the right strings on his papa .Seb's Finnish is shit,he can't say a single word to save himself.So whenever Lando wants to push his buttons he speaks in Finnish.

"Hey you squirt open the door!"Seb kicked Lando's door to which he got a "Nahhh" as a reply.

"Look at him Kimi...just 9 and talks for the whole of England"Kimi shut his mouth by kissing him."He's your son Seb ,what more do you expect?"Kimi moved his hands to Seb's waist and Seb leaned to Kimi's touch.

"It's getting late Seb,can we?"Kimi asked and Seb pulled Kimi to their bedroom.Every Saturday night was vodka day. Seb took two glasses and poured vodka in one and diet coke in another.They clinked the glasses and Kimi drowned the vodka.

After four more rounds ,Seb took the vodka bottle and Kimi pouted."Only one more pint pleaseeee"Kimi pouted and Seb refused."No Kimi you've had enough".Kimi pulled Seb closer and placed a soft kiss on his lips.

"I don't know how i got so lucky Seb."Kimi made Seb go bright red and Kimi got up from his place near the bed.He ran to the balcony and spread his hands in the air giggling.

"Hey Seb,come on"Kimi called out and Seb got up and stood near Kimi.Kimi wrapped his arms around Seb and gave a big smooch on his cheek.Seb looked at his adorable drunk husband .

He really got lucky!Thanks to his mom.


	2. Chapter 2

“Hey look at that guy” Two girls , sitting next to Seb on the train were pointing at someone and giggling continuously.

“He is so handsome,isn’t he” the girl with the blond hair pointed her hand at the same guy again and again. Seb overlooked and tried to catch a glimpse of who it was.They were actually pointing to Kimi who was standing near a little girl and talking to her.Seb and Kimi were going out to meet up with Jenson and Fernando,their usual routine and they usually tend to take the train instead of their car because by the end of the day atleast one of them will be wasted or they would end up staying at Jenson’s.They left Lando with George like they always used to.

“Do you think he is Swedish? Or Russian?”The other brunette was literally drooling at his husband. Sure his husband is handsome,but this was too funny to watch for Seb.

“You know what?What about you ask him out when we get down, he doesn’t seem to be married”the brunette encouraged her friend and her friend let out a dreamy sigh.Kimi was still taking to that little girl placing his sunglasses on her head and laughing with her.His tattoos peeked out slightly from his grey hoodie and his legs looked super hot in those skinny jeans.Kimi’s was still unaware of these girls and he was casually lifting his hand to hold up the rail to which the girls were squealing.Seb was going to have a good laugh about this later.

“Excuse me,I overheard your conversation .Can I help you?”Seb stifled his laugh and remained to stay serious .The girls gave him a bizarre look and one of them flipped him the bird .Seb shrugged at it and casually relaxed letting out a soft sigh ”He looks Finnish though”. The girls gave him one more weird look so Seb sank back into his seat texting Jenson that they would be there by fifteen minutes.

When they got out of the train the girls started following Kimi quickly.Kimi turned around and looked for Seb but Seb signalled him that he will follow him.He wants to watch the drama unfold so badly.He walked along with the girls and one of them patted on Kimi’s shoulder.

“Hi”The blonde girl smiled at Kimi seductively.Kimi was genuinely confused at what was going on. He smiled at the girls and asked “You want something?”

“I- please don’t mistake me”The brunette came in front and started rambling.”My friend here is really interested in you,do you think you might take her out on a date?”the blonde girl was looking at the ground trying to play innocent.

“So you really love him and you want to marry him,tell him out loud girls”Seb interrupted them throwing his hands around Kimi and the brunette pulled Seb away from him.

“What is your problem?”The girl asked Seb and Seb gave her one of his angelic smiles.”I told you I wanted to help you,so here I am”Kimi smirked at Seb’s antics and cleared his throat.

“So you want to go on a date with me?”Kimi tugged his hoodie arms and his tattoos were fully on display.

“ Yeaah”The blonde girl jumped up and down hugging her friend.

“But I have made one little mistake”Kimi shrugged “I already got married “

“Its okay, divorce her and take my friend out on a date”The brunette said enthusiastically to Kimi.

“This actually seems like a good idea,what do you say Seb”He looked at his husband whose face was red.Seb broke away from the brunettes hold and ran to Kimi.He smacked him hard on his biceps continuously cursing in German.

“So you want to divorce me eh? Find an another girl?Let me remind you that you are married to me”He showed his wedding band and the girls turned beet red.They were so embarrassed as Kimi and Seb continued smacking each other playfully.

“Im sorry girls”Kimi shouted at those girls and hugged Seb from behind smacking a kiss on his cheek.”Groosss”Seb wiped his cheek but turned back to his husband hitting him one last time.

“Let’s go.Jenson will kill us if we are not on time.”

\-------------------------

“Well European cars are the best in the world, what they have done on the European model is something fundamental, now, let's take a look at what we have implemented to them in our hybrid road car,as we see we don't have enough stroke length for the piston,and hence the torque and the power is very normal for a normal rpm, I'm going to increase the stroke length of the piston,as simple as that,and since I've increased the stroke length of the piston,the volumetric efficiency...”

“This will not work in what we are going for”Kimi raised his voice from the back of the presentation .The presentation was to discuss about their future in road cars which they were going to implement with a stash of racing car’s touch.The guy who was giving the presentation looked clearly annoyed but Kimi’s former engineer stood up trying to defend Kimi.

“I don’t need any rally driver to design my car.Everyone should know what their places are and act accordingly”The guy shouted to the whole room but it was mostly pointed at Kimi who was fuming .It was very rare that people got on Kimi’s nerve,but if they did they are dead meat.Kimi stormed out of the room shouting some profanities in Finnish and his engineer followed Kimi.

“Kimi don’t mind what he was saying,he did not know that-“

“Fuck you” with that Kimi went to the car park and took his car out.He really needed some vodka as his head was pounding real hard. Kimi did not mind getting a speeding ticket but all he wanted was to go home.

When he reached home Seb was already there ,TV turned On and Lando doing his homework.When he saw Kimi entering he ran towards him and hugged Kimi’s legs.Kimi weakly smiled at Lando and Seb held out the popcorn bowl in front of Kimi.Kimi shrugged.

“Hey munchkin,why do you think our driver daddy is sad today”Lando climbed up Seb’s lap and shrugged.Kimi just wanted to go to their room and rest flat out.He hates it when people calls him a driver,and Seb knew that.

“Leave me alone Seb”he tried to get away but Seb caught his wrist.He pulled Kimi back to the couch and Lando started laughing.

“Daddy was Papa a good driver or a bad driver?”Lando asked Seb and Seb pretended to think”Why don’t we ask the driver himself?”Seb bopped Kimi’s nose and Kimi stood up ,his face burning with anger.

“Dont you have any sense in your fucking little head Seb,I told you not to call me that “

“But i was just joking”Seb fell into the couch looking small and Lando’s lips started to wobble.He knew that his papa had a bad temper but he was really not used to it.

“Just shut your fucking mouth and go away,I don’t want to see your face”Kimi shut the bedroom door and Seb sank down pulling Lando close to his chest.Lando wiped the tears from Seb’s cheeks and gave him a kiss.

“I’m sorry daddy”Lando still looked scared at his parents fighting.It was the first time their parents had fought this loud in front of him.Seb kissed his son’s cheek and ruffled his hair.He slept with Lando that night and woke up early in the morning before Kimi and left the house early to give Kimi some space.But that doesn’t mean that he could shout in front of their child like that.

That day Kimi did not turn up.He did not text Sebastian even though Seb tried to call him multiple times.After a long time Seb came to know that Kimi was still working in the office,but it was not really something Kimi would do,stay the night at the office.Kimi rarely goes to work and never takes it seriously but this was something to worry about.Seb stayed the whole night Kimi would come home but he didn’t.Seb fell asleep on the couch and woke up when Lando shook him up telling that he was late for school.

Seb dropped Lando off at school telling him that he will be late this evening as he had his yearly audits and mock trials,but in reality he did not. He did not want to face Kimi because he fought with them for such a silly reason.Seb knew it was irrational of him to leave Lando at the Rosberg’s but Seb needed some time to himself.He did not sleep the whole night so as soon as he parked his car and entered his room he just flopped flat out on the couch feeling tired.Work can always wait.

Seb called Kimi about seven times but Kimi never bothered to pick up his calls.He looked at the watch in his office and it showed eight.He knew Lando would have had his dinner by then and would have gone to sleep.

By nine,it started to rain heavily.Seb looked out through the windows and forgot that it was so late.He ran downstairs and started his car,his engine roared to life but as soon as it did,it died.

Fuck him.

There was no petrol in his car.

He also forgot to bring his umbrella.

Seb walked out shivering from the cold rain and pulled his coat to himself.When he came out of the parking lot,there were no other cars parked outside.Seb cursed at the rain and started waking to the nearby bus station.When he was halfway through,a car honked and he turned around.

Lando opened the door and ran towards Seb.Kimi got out from the driver’s side ,his face hitting the rain water dripping off his face.

“Daddy come lets go home”Lando pulled Seb towards the car but Seb did not budge.He stood in the pouring rain and glared at Kimi whose face was expressionless. Typical Kimi.

“Get in Seb”Kimi called out but still Seb was glaring at him.He was shivering in the cold like a stranded puppy but he was not willing to get in the car until he gets a proper answer.

“Go with papa Lando”Seb urged Lando but Lando shook his head and hid himself behind Seb’s legs.Kimi came to them his black shirt already wet displaying his tattoos.

“Please Seb,its raining”Kimi pulled Seb’s wrist without expecting an answer from him and dragged him to his car.Seb did not look at Kimi’s face but got into the passenger’s seat turned on the heat,Lando climing up at the back.Kimi paced his hand above Seb’s but Seb pulled away.”I am sorry”Kimi sounded sincere but Seb ignored him.He shook the water from his head and asked Lando how was school.Lando started his usual ramble and it comfortably filled the odd silence in the car.

When they got back home, Lando went to his room to sleep.Seb removed his jacket and his shirt and walked to the fridge.He opened the fridge and took out the water bottle while Kimi did the same.Seb snatched the bottle from Kimi and started drinking it without looking at his husband.He threw the towel that was on his shoulder on the couch and started walking but Kimi pulled him and pinned him to the wall. Seb looked away as Kimi cupped his cheeks ,his blonde hair still dripping from the shower.

“I’m so sorry”Kimi tried to kiss Seb but Seb pulled away.”Is this how you swear in front of my child?”Seb sat on the couch trying to surf through the channels on TV but Kimi pulled the remote away from him and started peppering him with kisses.

“Sebby”

“What”Seb snapped at him and Kimi raised both his hands up

“There was this bastard who sent me out the other day that i was just a driver,when I came home you called me the same,so I got angry”Seb signed and turned towards Kimi.

“That doesn’t mean you can bail out on us like that”

“I know,I know”He pulled Seb closer to him and caught Seb’s hand pressing a soft kiss to it.”Guess who is participating in rallying again?”

“Kimi!That’s great, you didn’t even tell me.”

“I wanted out from the office.Moreover Lando is old enough “Seb always wanted Kimi to go back to rallying,but as Lando was still a kid Kimi thought it would be the best if he stayed back and looked after Lando.

“Im so proud of you”Seb captured Kimi’s lips in his and dragged him back to bed. Kimi panted at the loss of contact when Seb pushed him away but Seb shused him.

“Kimiiii Lando is sleeping in the next room”Seb rolled off from Kimi but Kimi pulled him back.He pressed a long kiss on his mouth and Seb dropped on top of him.

“Our son can sleep through an earthquake”Kimi pulled Seb’s jeans off him to which Seb gave up .

“Let’s make this a memorable night”

\---------------------------------

When Kimi was about to leave for his first race both their parents came home and they had a quiet little party with Jenson and Fernando also present. Seb’s mother pulled him aside and gave him a whisk to whisk the eggs.

“Mom,what do you want to know”Seb whisked the eggs and took a handful of almonds from the bowl which his mother was grinding.She swatted Seb’s hand away and leaned closer to him.

“Are you really happy with Kimi”His mother whispered. Seb stopped whisking and looked at his mother confused.

“Mum,its been six years.Do you really think I’m not happy?I mean look at us.We have a beautiful house,a really really cute son who is a pain in the ass sometimes,a lovable husband like Kimi who listens to whatever I ramble,what else do you want?I mean its too late mom,if you were really concerned.But yeah,I love Kimi he is perfect.We do fight, every now and then but I love every bit of him for that” He let his hand into the bowl once more for which his mom pulled the bowl away and gave him a stern look.He was so happy that Kimi was going back to what he loves.

“Just my concern dear”she pulled Seb into a tight hug and kissed his cheeks to which he fake gagged.”You are always my little baby and that’s why I am so concerned”

“Ya whatever mum”

Staying away from Kimi was really bringing the worst out of Seb.Sure there was sufficient amount of video calls,text messages and flowers now and then,Seb missed the warmth of Kimi.The bed was really cold without Kimi .Seb was usually a cuddler,whatever position he sleeps in,he gets up wrapped around Kimi like an octopus.He missed Kimi’s cooking,the way he smells like fresh rain and cinnamon.The way Seb sits on the kitchen top and distracts Kimi every time he cooks,Lando standing on the kitchen top with them singing random songs offkey.Sometimes Seb sleeps with facetime on,Kimi on the other side talking about his daily schedule,Lando cuddled up close to him.

One day when Seb was going through Lando’s school diary he found out that he had not been showing Seb his assignments.If Kimi were with them,he would usually check all this and Seb wished that Kimi was with them so that everything would be done by time.

“Landoo”He called his son who was playing NFS in their playstation.He ran down to Seb and winced when he saw his school diary.

“What is this Lando?”

“They’ve asked you to prepare insect box.Did you do it?”Lando was grinning at his father.

“Read properly...”Lando took the diary from Seb”Parents should make it for children.That's you and your husband.”Lando skipped to the fridge grabbing a bar of snickers.

“Oh no! I can't catch insects in London.I can't do this!”Seb started going through his diary to check if he had any other assignments.

“Otherwise, they will throw me out of the class.Then, I'll start playing games.”

“What? Are you blackmailing me?”

“I'm serious, dad.”Lando bit into the chocolate bar and hummed.

“Your papa isn't here.Call our security guard.”

“You go, dad.”Lando pouted at his dad which he was very sure that he got it from him.Seb’s pout always works.Now his own son is using it against him.

“If you want an insect box, call him.”Lando ran downstairs to call the security guard.Few minutes later they were going through giant boxes in the loft.

“Is there an insect box inside it?”Lando asked when they opened every single box. “No.Your dad treasures all that he used in school and college.Let's try... may be we can find it.”Seb went through every one of the big cardboard boxes that was taken down.

“Dad, I'll cut it.”Lando cut the cellotape of the last box they took down

“Your insect box!”Seb took out Kimi’s old insect box that way lying around and tossed it Lando.Lando happily skipped back to his room.Seb looked inside the box to find Kimi’s old books and diaries.He never knew that Kimi had a habit of maintaining a diary.He knew that going through someone’s diary was wrong,but Seb was curious.He wiped the dust of the yellow paged battered diary and took it to his bedroom.

_Kimi Raikonnen_

_WRC CHAMPION 2009_

Seb looked at the weird picture of Kimi with long hair and kissed it.He felt like a teenager going through his crush’s diary.

_I was a normal kid from a middle class household in Finland,but racing somehow became my passion.When i was at the age of four,my father bought me a go-kart and I would practice in my backyard.My mom thought it was just a phase until I went to my first go-kart race and won.My father,who was not the most wealthiest person took all the risks he had to ,to afford me a good go-kart and run behind sponsors.Everything was going well until my dad was fired one day.Then he was really not able to provide me properly and i was this emerging guy in go-karting who had no sponsors._

_Then a team signed me up._

_I was asked to move to someplace in the city so that I could do my factory runs every now and then.My teammate ,then was about to retire and they informed me my new teammate was from the same place,Finland.I was so excited as people from the same place makes you feel home when you were missing home._

_And it turned out to be true._

_Valtteri was everything I wanted in a teammate , a friend and more than that._

_A soulmate._

_Five months after pining after Valtteri we kissed in a alleyway near a bar in England after his first win._

_Valtteri was kind,he was this person on whom you could lean on and stay silent for hours withot talking anything.He always looked out for me,gave me all the confidence I needed,made sure that we would get into formula one together._

_No one in the team knew about our relationship,it was still new and cheesy.We were not the exhibitionist type of couple,but still our eyes glint when we look at each other.Valtteri’s father was one of the sponsors and more than that he was homophobic.Valtteri was so scared of his father that he always talks less in front of his team and never spares a look at me.According to his father,I was supposed to be his first enemy on the track,but he never knew that I wrecked his son everyday in the mattress he bought for Valtteri._

Seb gasped at the diary in front of him.Sure,it was never his business to look at his husband’s past,but he never knew Kimi had a past like this. Kimi told him every single thing ,even things that Seb never needed to know,but why did Seb not know about this. His eyes were blurred with tears as he looked through the pages in the diary .Lando knocked the door asking for dinner and Seb wiped his eyes frantically checking himself in the mirror throwing the diary under his bed.Seb wanted to know who this Valtteri guy was.He fed Lando who fell asleep on his lap and he carried Lando to his bed ,kissing him goodnight.Seb wanted to find out something at the same time he was guilty.He went back to the box to check if Kimi had any photos of them,when he found none ,he found himself googling for Valtteri.

_VALTTERI BOTTAS_

_FORMULA ONE DRIVER._

Seb looked at the guy,he was short at the same time the same height as him.The guy had two championships under his name and he was driving for Mercedes.He looked at his profile but found that Valtteri never made it to rallying even though he was signed up to partner Kimi.Seb spent the whole night searching for him and fell asleep with his phone on his face,nobody had to know that he was crying the whole night.


	3. Chapter 3

_It was not that long that we decided to get married.Valtteri was about to enter into formula one and I was given another year of rallying with the same team.We were very happy even though it was not known by anyone.One day when we snuck out of the track late night just because Valtteri wants to lie down and look at the stars ,he threw me the question._

_“Why don’t we get married Kimi?”He asked.His eyes were glinting with fear as well as love.He was scared that I was about to refuse.I was just thrown off by his sudden request.We were lying on the track fingers interwined together,Valtteri on my chest._

_“Its not that I am too fast,its just that my dad suspects that Im into something really fishy ,Once he finds out that I am in love with you,he will make sure that he’ll end both of our careers.I am not rushing you into anything ,its just that i want you by my side for the rest of my life.If I marry you atleast ,I’ll be satisfied that you are with me.I want to be yours even if its for a day”_

_The next day when we were supposed to go back to our apartment,we stood in the church which was in our neighbourhood exchanging our vows.Finally I get to call him mine.That was when his father interrupted us.He came with his bunch of security guards.I was in no position to defend myself from them as they threw punches on my face left and right.His father made sure that I will not be able to race anymore.He pulled a crying Valtteri with him and tossed the ring on my face.My dream of being with Valtteri was shattered in just a minute like a storm.I was bruised so badly for months that I couldn’t walk.A few weeks later I heard that Valtteri was sent to the Finnish military by his dad to complete his mandatory military service.I lost my seat in rallying and my physio wanted me to stay in bed for the next six months.It was horrible,I wasn’t even able to walk.All for the cost of love._

_Eventually I was able to train and the another team signed me as their test driver.The moment I got into he car,I felt that I needed to prove something to the world.Something that will make everyone look at me.Something great._

_I put my full self into training and finally I was able to race nine months after the incident.Sometime the voice of Valtteri still echoes in my head.All he wanted was to live with me for the rest of his life,but I was not even able to stay with him for a day.I want to live this life for him,for my Val who was taken away from me._

Seb shut the diary and placed it in the same cardboard box he took it from.He felt numb from crying the whole night.The only thing which Seb did not get was why Kimi hadn’t told him of this.He already told Kimi everything about his life,was he not trustworthy enough or did Kimi wanted to bury the fact that he had another person in his life.He took his phone from the nightstand and unlocked it.

Three missed calls from Kimi.

He just typed an “I am tired,was busy in the office yesterday ” and threw his phone back on the bed.Lando already left with George and Seb pulled one of his old hoodies from his cupboard.He called Christian and informed him that he’ll not come to office today and asked his mum if she wa busy.Seb needed some peace,and he wanted to talk to his mum.

Five hours later and a steaming mug of Earl Grey in his hand Seb sat on the sofa of his childhood home inhaling the homey scent.His mom came back with a batch of freshly baked cookies and offered him some.

“Why are you so silent baby?Is everything alright”Seb’s mom shifted herself and sat near him.She was so shocked when Seb turned up looking like a mess,eyes red and curls tousled.She hugged him tight and never asked him anything until Seb wanted a cup of tea.

Seb snuggled into her and laid his head on his shoulder just like he used to do when he was a kid.His mom hushed him and it made him feel so small yet safe.

“Does Kimi know you are here?”She asked him and he shook his head.”Did you fight with him?”He shook his head again.This was not a fight,this was something more important than that.

“Mum don’t pick up if anybody calls ,even Kimi.”His mom gave him a tight smile and kissed his forehead “Go sleep,I will wake you up for lunch”.Seb climbed up the stairs and went into his old room which was now Lando’s.He loved the small cot and how he used to lay on it dreaming about fairytales.

Seb was so reluctant to go home but he shook his head when his mum asked him if he wanted to stay the night.He knew that he should tell his mum what happened but his heart was not willing to give up on Kimi.”Are you sure you want to drive this late honey?”His mum fussed up his curls and Seb gave her a tight smile,the one that did not reach his eyes.He reassured his mum that he will call when he gets home and put the box which contained the cookies that Lando loved.

When Seb reached home it was already eight and Kimi was sitting on the couch watching news.Lando was watching some random cartoons on youtube.When Seb opened the door Kimi rushed to his husband and looked at him worried.

“Seb where did you go?I called Christian and he told me that you called in sick and then Lewis had to tell me that you went to your mother’s.Is everything alright Seb?”Kimi caressedSeb’s face in his hands and Seb was controlling his urge to burst out in tears.He was intelligent enough to know that Kimi hid his past for a reason but still it hurted bad.

_I wanted to live with him even if it was for a day._

_Its just that I want you by my side for the rest of my life._

Seb gathered himself together and smiled at Kimi through the tears.”Yeah,everything is fine Kimi.I just wanted to go to Mums”Seb pulled away from him and went to their bedroom.He shut the door and flopped on the bed duvet pulled up to his face.

When Kimi noticed something was fishy he looked around the room and saw the box which had the diary.Kimi slowly walked towards the box and looked at the dishevelled contents.He sighed.The one thing he did not want Seb to know was out there like a wall.Kimi calmed himself andwent to his backpack and took a diary.

“Give this to your dad”Kimi thrusted a diary in Lando’s hands.”Tell him I’ve never written something in a diary for the past nine years”With that Kimi stormed into the guest bedroom and Lando handed the diary to Seb telling him that he was going to play with George. Seb placed the diary on the bed and looked at Lando who was sad. Seb called back Lando and kissed him on the cheek telling him that he will always love him.

“Forever?”Lando asked his dad with big blue eyes.

“Forever”Seb hugged him again and let his son go.Lando ran outside and barged into the Rosbergs.Lewis was feeding George and Nico was making pancakes.When Nico saw Lando he ruffled his hair and asked him to sit with George so he could have some.Lando politely sat down in one of the chairs and Lewis fed him some.Lando shook his head and refused.

“You ok there little man” Lewis scooted close to Lando and placed his hand on Lando’s.Lando’s hugged Lewis and to be honest Lewis was shook.Lando was always this smiley little sunshine who makes people around him happy.Lewis shushed Lando and tears started brimming Lando’s eyes.Nico came and pulled Lando in and George joined them.

“Hey hey hey,baby don’t cry now”Lewis pulled away from Lando and wiped the tears out of Lando’s eyes.Nico lifted Lando up and placed him on his waist taking him to the fridge .”You want some icecream sunshine?”Lando hid his face in Nico’s shoulder and Nico chuckled.”There there,lets have some icecream”Nico lifted the tub out of the fridge and Lewis put them into bowls cutting up some fruits to top them with.Lando hesitated to take the bowl but when George fed him some he happily obliged.

“You want to watch some Disney?”Lewis turned on the TV and the boys sat in the middle with Nico and Lewis on both the sides cuddling them.

“Lando is sad”Lando looked at Nico.”Why sunshine”Nico glanced at Lewis.

“Dad and Papa are not talking properly.I think its because of me”Lando cuddled further up to Nico who wrapped his arms around him.

“Sweetheart,sometimes daddy and papa have adult problems.Nothing is because of you little man.I am pretty sure your dad cant hold a grudge at your papa,you know how much they love each other.You see us,we fight most of the time,but at the end of the day its family that all matters “Lewis kissed Lando’s forehead and Lando nodded.

“So who is up for some Lion King”George shouted and everyone laughed at that.

Seb opened the diary and a fresh set of tears fell down.He wiped them with the back of his and took a deep breath.

_08-09-2019_

_Sebastian._

_The name that brought be so much happiness._

_My ray of sunshine._

_If anyone had asked me if there is love after a love failure,I would say yes.I never wanted to get married after what happened with Valtteri.But this person,he was so funny,so intellectual and to top of it all he made my life way better than what it used to be._

_But I have always questioned myself,do I deserve him?He is so much more and he gives so much to me.For the first time I realized that love is not only about taking care of somebody,its also being taken care of by somebody._

_I miss the way the laughs,the loud cackle that sounds so embarrassing yet so cute.The way his eyes sparkle when he laughs,the way he hugs me everyday when he comes home.His small dainty yet muscular hands engulfing my waist.He hooks his chin on my shoulder and talks about his whole day and never minds if I am listening or not.I miss the way he holds on to my hands holding for his dear life when we go out.I love every star in his constellation.I love the way that he sleeps with the duvet wrapped all around him like a cute little burrito.He can talk so much about things that are so insignificant.The way his voice shrieks when he is in the shower singing old rock songs.The way he takes care of Lando,I am so grateful and proud that we decided to have Lando,things took a wild turn every single day and I fell in love with the human being more and more every day._

_This is the first time that I have ever been without him and now I am missing him so bad,a person to call my own,somebody waiting home telling our son that papa will be home in just few more days.Falling asleep to his voice even when its miles apart is soothing.He is my medicine ,my partner through thick and thin._

_I love you more than anything Seb._

_Always yours,_

_Kimi._

Seb clutched the diary close to his heart and sighed.He silently opened the bedroom door and padded out to where Kimi was.Kimi was sprawled out in the couch,his blond hair sticking all over the place and he was watching Modern family.Kimi always found it dumb but Seb always insisted him to watch with him.He silently pulled himself together and walked to the couch.He crawled on the couch filling the small space that Kimi left for him and pulled the duvet over both of them.Kimi was shocked but Seb caressed his face just like Kimi did when he came home.

“Just remember that I always love you Kimi,whatever happens”Kimi opened his mouth to talk but Seb shushed him.Kimi draped his hands around Seb’s waist and held him together.

_I wanted to live with him even if it was for a day._

_I love you more than anything Seb._

_“_ I am sorry Kimi but I had to do this”Seb thought to himself and sighed.

_“_ Christian do you know who manages the sportsmen around Finland?”Seb looked up from his laptop and asked Christian when they were in the middle of a discussion.

“Yea I guess so Seb,is it for any specific reason?”Christian gave him a confused glace.

“No no,its just for a case, Something I have been working on”Seb stuttered but Christian did not look convinced.

“Ask Ethan,he might help you “Christian casually dropped in and they continued with their discussion.

Seb straightened out his hoodie and looked around the room,there was a Finland flag hanging on one of the walls , bags and helmet thrown around in random places.Seb continuously fiddled with his nails and straightened his curls.He looked at his phone and was disappointed when there was no messages.He needed something to fiddle around.

Minutes later the door opened and a guy entered the room followed by another one who gave him his watch.It was Valtteri.Seb cleared his throat and Valtteri looked at him confused.

“And you are?”Valtteri zipped open his suit lending out his hand.

“Sebastian Vettel , Kimi’s husband”Seb looked at Valtteri’s face fall for a moment,but he regained himself and gave Seb a crooked smile.

“Then who am I “


	4. Chapter 4

"Landooo don't open the door" Seb ran behind Lando carrying his school bag with him. Kimi was in the restroom, who just woke up , tired from his trip. Lando reached for the peephole and tried to look in it when Seb pushed Lando to the side and opened the door.

Valtteri.

Seb froze not knowing what to do. Valtteri bent down and smiled at Lando. Lando hid behind Seb's leg and Valtteri smiled softly at the kid.

"Hey... I'm Valtteri" He held his hand out and Seb whispered "it's okay" to Lando. Lando peeked out from Seb's legs and gave him a shy wave. Seb put his hand around Lando and moved further away.

"Come in Valtteri" Seb let him inside and he lifted Lando up talking with him about video games.

"I bought you some" Valtteri held out a bag and Lando murmured a quick thanks and walked to where his school bag was kept. Seb quickly moved out, Lando in tow shutting the door and Kimi called out for Seb.

"Sebby, Seb.... " Kimi came out of the restroom freshly shaved, towel hanging around his shoulder, shirtless and his hair sticking around in random directions.

When Kimi saw Valtteri in front of him he was shocked. He dropped the towel on the floor and looked at Valtteri trying to workout the gears in his mind.

"Hey Kimi" Valtteri picked up the towel from the floor and placed it on the couch. Kimi looked around and tried to shuffle the things in the hallway looking nervous.

"Sebbb... " He called out once more but no answer. Valtteri placed his duffel bag on the dining table, the one which Seb took days to pick out ("white and black is the theme Kimi and I need this table ") Valtteri sat down next to Kimi.

" He left with your son" Kimi nodded at that and then looked around. "Um... Let me go and put on something" Kimi awkwardly stood  
up from the couch and moved to their room. He tried to call Seb but Seb left his phone in their room. Kimi put his hands on his head and flopped on the bed. He was absolutely unsure of what Seb was trying to do.

He called Jenson to ask if Seb was there. Luckily Jenson told that he just came to their home and was talking with Fernando. Kimi asked Jenson to pass the phone to Seb.

"Seb, what are you doing? " Kimi heard a soft gasp from the other side

"I invited him Kimi" Seb told him, his voice raspy. Kimi was pretty sure Seb was crying.

"Why? "

"Because... " Seb paused for a moment and all he could hear was his breathing. He could see Valtteri going through the living room pictures.

"Because I love you Kimi" Seb sniffed silently and continued "A day lived with him would've been like a life living together with him.But I was unlucky."

"Seb stop this" Kimi pleaded.

"You wrote this with tears.How painful you would've been through to write this?I didn't just love you,I love your dream, your desires,  
your feelings, I love everything.I want you too.  
I want you totally.Today your Valtteri..." Seb's breath hitched but he continued speaking

"Today your Valtteri is here for you.For today, think that me and our son are non-existent."

"Even after spending all our life happily together, if you feel atleast for a moment that this didn't happen in your life, my life with you will become meaningless." With that Seb ended the call leaving a speechless Kimi. Kimi threw a random sweater that belonged to Seb and went to the living room.

"He's cute" Valtteri pointed at the picture of Lando when they first adopted him.

"Yeah thanks" Kimi scratched the back of his neck still not able to digest the whole thing.

Meanwhile back at Jenson's Seb was stirring on the bed not able to sleep. He never slept properly the past nights, so Jenson pulled him to their guest bedroom and made him sleep. Seb tried to but he couldn't.

"Hey Jense, do you have any sleeping pills" Seb asked and Jenson frowned at that.

"You never take sleeping pills Seb. Are you sure you want to take them? "

"Yes please, I haven't had a good night's sleep in days" Jenson pulled out the medicine box and passed the bottle to Seb.

"Just take one and place it in the nearby drawer" Jenson left the room and Seb pulled three pills out of it and gulped them without even drinking the water. He knew there was no turning back to what he did. 

"Let's not waste our time Kimi" Valtteri looked at him like he did when they were together. The chubby cheeks have gone being replaced with very manly beard, his physique totally toned, and his expensive clothing just proving him that he earns millions every year. Kimi was not very bad himself, he just did not like to flaunt what he had.

"Ohh cartier" Valtteri lifted Kimi's arms to look at the santos de cartier bracelet that Kimi was wearing. It was an anniversary gift from Seb. Kimi tried to tug his hand away but failed.

"Take me somewhere" Valtteri asked lacing his fingers with Kimi.

"Where ? "

"Anywhere ,anywhere with you. I just don't want to waste all this" Valtteri sounded sad and Kimi sighed.

Kimi came back with his car keys but Valtteri put them back in the key bowl.

"I want to ride with you on your bike" Valtteri thrusted kimi's bike keys into his hands and all Kimi could remember was the last time he took Seb out in his bike.

"Okay" Kimi took out his Enfield from the garage and Valtteri was literally stuck on him like a second skin. He wrapped his arms around Kimi's waist and shouted for Kimi to go faster. He never remembered Valtteri to be this enthusiastic.

"Go faster Kimi" He hugged tighter around kimi's hips and Kimi smiled at him looking at the mirror. This was a whole new Valtteri he was looking at.

"Come on" Kimi stopped the vehicle nearby a restrobar that Kimi always loved. The bar was near a lakeside and Kimi would always come here to clear his mind. Valtteri bounced in front of him jingling the keys.

"Vodka double for this gentleman please" Valtteri told the barman but Kimi refused.

"Whyyyy" Valtteri's face fell.

"I don't drink on weekdays Val" Kimi regreted telling him that seeing Valtteri's reaction.

"Just for me please, only today" Valtteri pleased his crystal blues shining at the lighting of the bar.

"Okay" Valtteri cheered and ordered a vodka double with a side of fish and chips. They took their drinks outside and Valtteri looked at the lake.

"It's so nice here" Kimi smiled at that.

"Am I looking still the same?Am I up to your mark?" Valtteri suddenly asked Kimi.

"50%"

"Why?" Valtteri took a bite of his fish and hummed.

"There is a big difference between  
present Valtteri & rallying Valtteri" Kimi shrugged his shoulders placing his hands on top of Valtteri's

"May be you're right.Only my physical  
appearance has changed.Kimi, my heart  
is still the same.Am I talking too much?" Valtteri chuckled at the way he was rambling. He was never the one with the words.

"I can't help it.Because I've lost many things." Kimi's hands tensed and Valtteri facepalmed himself

"Oh sorry! I upset you." Let's go, I have a surprise for you back home. 

"Sit... Sit..." Valtteri arranged all the cutleries on the table. "I've cooked all that I know.Taste every dish,hope it will be good.Just taste and see..." Kimi sat down opposite Valtteri looking at his lover who was rambling for about half an hour about how they used to sneak out to break the diet during their rallying days.

"This is my special one." Valtteri placed the fish on the table. "I learnt how to make it when I was in Japan for a few days, I'm telling you Japanese food is the best"

" Join with me."Kimi pulled Valtteri on his lap "Yeah." Valtteri cut the fish and fed it to Kimi.

"Kimi, don't hesitate.  
Come on." Valtteri started fiddling with the buttons in Kimi's shirt. Kimi tried to protest but eventually gave in.

"I can't forget this day!" He fed another piece of fish to Kimi but Kimi remained silent.

"Say something." Valtteri put his hands under Kimi's chin and lifted his face. His eyes were pooled with tears.

"My time is elapsing.

Please..."

"Val, I can't forget any day spent with you., will you forgive me?" Kimi pushed himself from the chair and wiped his eyes from the back of his palm. Valtteri followed him and sat near Kimi on the couch.

"Hey, what's this?Crying like a child?!What did you do to excuse you?You took me to all the places. Beach, restaurant, bike ride.Wow! In one day, you did several things for me.Do you know why I asked youto take me to all these places?When I visit the places we had  
visited now, you must be seen there.

I should live in your memories.

I should die thinking you.

Kimi, will you give  
that right to me?"

"Let's brake the silence." Kimi closed the gap between then kissing Valtteri deeply. Valtteri removed the buttons in Kimi's shirt and Kimi pushed him on the cou-

Sebastian woke up suddenly looking at the surroundings. That was a bizzare dream. He knew that he did the most stupid thing a husband could ever do, but he couldn't bear the thought of someone else touching his husband, be it his ex. Seb grabbed his belongings and left the house writing a note for Jenson that he is going home. That this was a stupid decision. He wanted to give his husband happiness by sacrificing himself. Seb got into his car, splashed some water on his face and wiped it with the hoodies sleeve.

"Don't be don't be dontt" Seb chanted under his breath and sped the car onto the driveway. He wanted to go home. Kimi was his home,the cost of giving Kimi the happiness he deserved made him realize how much he loved Kimi.

When Sebastian reached their apartment he ran to their flat and saw it open. Seb walked inside calling out for Kimi. Kimi stood in the balcony looking at the flight in the sky. Seb went back into their flat and found a piece of paper on the kitchen isle.

_Dear Seb,_

_I can't forget you in my life since_  
_you presented a memorable day to me!_

_Thanks._

_When you left Kimi to me,_

_I understood the_  
_compassion in your eyes._

_You gave me one day to_  
_spend with him._

_But all we needed_  
_was just an hour!_

_Silence for 40 minutes._

_Formal inquiries for 10 minutes._

_10 minutes to talk._

_He talked only about you_  
_even in those ten minutes._

_I realized how well you've_  
_merged in his life._

_When we fear of losing our beloved,_  
_we become possessive of them._

_We will be at peace if we realize that_  
_they're with safer hands than us,_

_I'm taking leave from you_  
_in that state of mind._

_In my next birth also,_  
_I should love Kimi._

_Not as Valtteri, but as Sebastian._

_Thanks,Seb._

Seb dropped the paper and ran back to the balcony. Kimi was staring blankly at the vehicles moving like ants.

"Valtte-"

"He left" Kimi still looked at the sky and shut his eyes. 

"I've asked you many times if you had loved any one.You never thought of revealing it to me.Kimi, why did you hide it from me?" Seb held Kimi's hands in his and kissed him.

"Seb, a man can tolerate anything,but can never tolerate another man sharing his husband's love.I did not want to give you that pain.

That's why I hid it from you.

But you've searched that guy and found him,

and brought him infront of me,

at that time, I don't know,

I became speechless!

Every time we talked, all I had was you in mind. I love you Seb, more than anything in this world. I'm sorry , will you forgi-"

Seb pressed his mouth on Kimi's pulled away to wipe his tears.

"I love you Kimi, I love you so much " The door opened and when Lando saw them in each other's arms he let himself into the family hug mumbling "they're at it again".This was their family and Kimi would never trade it for anything else.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here it ends!!!! Actually the part from Valtteri taking Kimi out to them kissing is a dream (to clarify as it was a mess there)I planned it to be a one shot yet it turned out so long! And thanks for travelling with me in this journey as always, please leave your comments and prompts if any. You can also reach me on tumblr. I'm blueflaglovesbwoah and you can drop me your comments there too. 😇


End file.
